2012 *

An apocalypse now kind of disaster flick, "2012" employs hokum Mayan prophecies and hokier science to precipitate the end of the world, accompanied by hair's breadth escapes by our unlikely bookish protagonist. The special effects are spectacular and are, of course, the real stars of the movie. The story pulls together high and low elements to give the disaster a political and a human face, but there's literally nothing memorable except the lavish inventiveness of the disasters. Clocking in at more than two and a half hours, you might want to check out RunPee.com to plan your bio-break.

Rated PG-13. 158 minutes. Roland Emmerich - Director / Writer / Producer, Harold Kloser - Writer / Producer / Composer, Larry J. Franco - Producer, Dean Semler - Cinematographer, Thomas Wander -Composer, Barry Chusid - Production Designer, David Brenner - Editor, Peter S. Elliot - Editor. Produced and distributed by Columbia Pictures.

Principal actors: John Cusack, Amanda Peet, Chwetel Ejiofor, Thandie Newton, Oliver Platt, Tom McCarthy, Woody Harrelson, Danny Glover.